Praying for my husband was the original reason I felt convicted to start this blog. I actually followed another woman who would lead women in prayer, weekly, over live video for their husbands. It was very uplifting. This same woman, who is around the same age as me and a mother to an adorable little boy, lost her husband in a sudden death this past year. It was a horrible loss, and at a very young age she became a widow. It was an eye opener, to many of us I'm sure, that tomorrow is never promised--not just for us, but for the ones we love the most. I already admired this woman's faith and drive in life before her husband passed, but her true testimony came out after her husband passed by the way she handled this drastic change in her life. She gave it all to God. She hurts and cries, but she also knows and trusts that her Heavenly Father has her and her son wrapped tightly in his arms.
All too often we choose to blame and/or question God when things go wrong, instead of trusting him. Eleven years ago, I was tempted to blame God when my first husband left me and our son to start his new life. I struggled for a while over it, and I even made terrible choices to hide the pain instead of giving it to God. Through friends and family, over time I was able to feel encouraged and be reminded that God was working in mine and my son's life; he was NOT abandoning us. I had to learn to trust that he had us wrapped in his arms, too, but I had to stop trying to control things on my own. Quite frankly, He Ain't The Leaving Kind by Rascal Flatts became my inspiration and it was played in my car on a daily basis, to and from work, for months. If you are now or have ever been in a similar situation, I encourage you to listen to that song. Not just because it's a country song and I love country, but also because the second verse will speak directly to you... Well, actually, I encourage everyone to listen to it, no matter what you're going through. It's a great song for everybody.
At that point in my life, I didn't know where God was directing my path. I still don't, but I've grown more spiritually over the years and I'm more at peace with letting Jesus take the wheel now than I was then. What I do know is that at some point along the way, God placed a man who was going through similar pain in my path... Well, he put us in each other's paths. Because of the hurt and damage, it took us both some time to trust each other but the love was there from day one. No, I'm not saying it was "love at first sight," but we did become instant friends and grew a bond that we had no clue would lead us to where we are today. The Lord works in mysterious ways.
I didn't see myself remarrying, and whoever I ended up with I certainly didn't see it being the man I'm married to today. He is much better than I could've imagined. Of course, like every marriage, we have our struggles and some phases in life can be more challenging than others. But you know what? He ain't the leaving kind. (Like what I did there?) 😉 Once I knew this was the man I wanted to marry and retry giving my heart in trust to my Rascal Flatts theme song changed to one we all know, God Bless The Broken Road.
I have always prayed for my husband but a couple years back, when I first met the aforementioned friend at a Women's Bible Study, it dawned on me that I wasn't making him a PRIORITY in my prayers as much as a I should be. I realized that I needed to make it a point to intentionally pray for him every day. I even set a reminder on my phone at 4pm every day, so that in case I haven't already prayed for him I would remember to then. I've seen prayer make a huge difference in our marriage. The days and weeks I am more fervent in my prayers, there is a strengthening in both of us individually and as a couple. Likewise, I can even see a difference when I get relaxed in my prayer time and don't make it as much of a priority as I normally would. There tends to be more stress, more temptation to handle things wrong, and we aren't getting along as well.
After watching what my friend experienced in losing her husband, it started weighing on me to keep the idea going of women praying together for their husbands. Of course, I reached out and made sure that she didn't mind me starting my own version of praying for your husband and she was very sweet in her response. So here I am!
Why is it so important that we pray for our husbands? From the very beginning of creation, when God created Adam he said, (paraphrasing) "This man won't survive on his own! I'll make him a suitable mate." The irony of our society today, is that so many women feel like they're not treated equal to men. That's because God did not create us to be equal, he created us to be suitable! That does NOT mean we are below man or above man. We were created different with different purposes, meant to compliment each other. God created us because man needed us. Clearly, we hold a special place in God's eyes and in man's. It's up to us how we choose to use the gift that God gave us. We could use it to hold "power" over man, demand special rights, or we could use it as God intended; to be helpful and supportive.
Have you noticed that your husband seeks your opinion and advice in a lot of the decisions he makes? Yeah, that's why God made you. Ever notice that (most) men get stressed when things don't go the way they had planned? Yep, that's what we're here for! Does he get the man flu and whine a lot? Hmmm, I'm not sure if that one actually counts for us wives but that's definitely one of the reasons God created women to be MOTHERS, too-- let her baby him while he's sick.
Of course, God also created us to live our own lives. He didn't create us solely for the purpose of taking care of men. That's just our specialty! Embrace it, ladies!
There is no better help we can give to our husbands than to lift them up in prayer. My flesh sometimes (OFTEN, if I'm being honest) desires to get annoyed with my husband, bicker with him over silly things, correct how he does the dishes, laundry or other things that feel major at the time but in retrospect are so minute. Whenever he reads this, I'm sure he will laugh and roll his eyes because he knows exactly what I'm talking about. Of course we're both guilty of not always handling things the way we should, and I try to remind myself that instead of getting mad I should be going to God in prayer. We're just two imperfect people living an imperfect life in an imperfect world. However, there is nobody better suited to remind me of how wonderful my husband is than God, himself. Whenever I'm feeling frustrated with him, God reminds me that I didn't marry him for how sloppy he can be or some of the silly things that he does. I married him for his devotion, his sincerity, the way he adores me, adores our children, loves my oldest son just like his own, how hard he works to provide for us, how much he admires my faith, his honesty, his loyalty, his humbled heart, and the list goes on...
My man deserves my prayers, daily. Prayers for his health, his mental stability, his heart, his spiritual walk, and everything in between. So does your man. Won't you join me in praying over them?
At that point in my life, I didn't know where God was directing my path. I still don't, but I've grown more spiritually over the years and I'm more at peace with letting Jesus take the wheel now than I was then. What I do know is that at some point along the way, God placed a man who was going through similar pain in my path... Well, he put us in each other's paths. Because of the hurt and damage, it took us both some time to trust each other but the love was there from day one. No, I'm not saying it was "love at first sight," but we did become instant friends and grew a bond that we had no clue would lead us to where we are today. The Lord works in mysterious ways.
I didn't see myself remarrying, and whoever I ended up with I certainly didn't see it being the man I'm married to today. He is much better than I could've imagined. Of course, like every marriage, we have our struggles and some phases in life can be more challenging than others. But you know what? He ain't the leaving kind. (Like what I did there?) 😉 Once I knew this was the man I wanted to marry and retry giving my heart in trust to my Rascal Flatts theme song changed to one we all know, God Bless The Broken Road.
I have always prayed for my husband but a couple years back, when I first met the aforementioned friend at a Women's Bible Study, it dawned on me that I wasn't making him a PRIORITY in my prayers as much as a I should be. I realized that I needed to make it a point to intentionally pray for him every day. I even set a reminder on my phone at 4pm every day, so that in case I haven't already prayed for him I would remember to then. I've seen prayer make a huge difference in our marriage. The days and weeks I am more fervent in my prayers, there is a strengthening in both of us individually and as a couple. Likewise, I can even see a difference when I get relaxed in my prayer time and don't make it as much of a priority as I normally would. There tends to be more stress, more temptation to handle things wrong, and we aren't getting along as well.
After watching what my friend experienced in losing her husband, it started weighing on me to keep the idea going of women praying together for their husbands. Of course, I reached out and made sure that she didn't mind me starting my own version of praying for your husband and she was very sweet in her response. So here I am!
Why is it so important that we pray for our husbands? From the very beginning of creation, when God created Adam he said, (paraphrasing) "This man won't survive on his own! I'll make him a suitable mate." The irony of our society today, is that so many women feel like they're not treated equal to men. That's because God did not create us to be equal, he created us to be suitable! That does NOT mean we are below man or above man. We were created different with different purposes, meant to compliment each other. God created us because man needed us. Clearly, we hold a special place in God's eyes and in man's. It's up to us how we choose to use the gift that God gave us. We could use it to hold "power" over man, demand special rights, or we could use it as God intended; to be helpful and supportive.Have you noticed that your husband seeks your opinion and advice in a lot of the decisions he makes? Yeah, that's why God made you. Ever notice that (most) men get stressed when things don't go the way they had planned? Yep, that's what we're here for! Does he get the man flu and whine a lot? Hmmm, I'm not sure if that one actually counts for us wives but that's definitely one of the reasons God created women to be MOTHERS, too-- let her baby him while he's sick.
Of course, God also created us to live our own lives. He didn't create us solely for the purpose of taking care of men. That's just our specialty! Embrace it, ladies!
There is no better help we can give to our husbands than to lift them up in prayer. My flesh sometimes (OFTEN, if I'm being honest) desires to get annoyed with my husband, bicker with him over silly things, correct how he does the dishes, laundry or other things that feel major at the time but in retrospect are so minute. Whenever he reads this, I'm sure he will laugh and roll his eyes because he knows exactly what I'm talking about. Of course we're both guilty of not always handling things the way we should, and I try to remind myself that instead of getting mad I should be going to God in prayer. We're just two imperfect people living an imperfect life in an imperfect world. However, there is nobody better suited to remind me of how wonderful my husband is than God, himself. Whenever I'm feeling frustrated with him, God reminds me that I didn't marry him for how sloppy he can be or some of the silly things that he does. I married him for his devotion, his sincerity, the way he adores me, adores our children, loves my oldest son just like his own, how hard he works to provide for us, how much he admires my faith, his honesty, his loyalty, his humbled heart, and the list goes on...
My man deserves my prayers, daily. Prayers for his health, his mental stability, his heart, his spiritual walk, and everything in between. So does your man. Won't you join me in praying over them?
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| Walking with my love on our wedding day, March 23, 2014 |
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Father, we come before you today, first and foremost to thank you for the men you entrusted our hearts with. You placed them in our lives to care for them, nurture them, and support them. Often, we lose sight of what our purpose is in our men's lives. It isn't to harm them, to make them feel like failures or treat them like kids. It's to be their biggest fans and to build them up when they're already feeling low... even when we don't necessarily think they deserve it.
Lord, marriage doesn't always seem fair and sometimes we don't feel like our husbands are reciprocating the same amount of love and support for us as we give them. Instead of getting angry and hurt about it, we want to lift it up to you. You have the power to soften and harden any heart. You are the God who turned a murderer into an apostle, a whore into a God-fearing woman, and you even turned my heart back toward you. Father, softening a husband's heart to be more in tune with his wife's needs is no major feat for you, but we do not only pray that you soften his heart. Please soften our heart towards him, too. Remind us that our husbands are trying, and remind us that we need to be trying too. Teach us to be more patient. Patient with him and patient with you. You don't always answer prayers right away, you answer them at the right moment. Help us to stay focused on our own hearts and our own actions as the wife, and to trust that while you are working in us you are also working in our husbands.
Lord, most importantly we pray that you keeps us ever mindful of how sacred marriage is to you. We made our vows before you, and you expect us not to take them lightly. Sometimes, the anger, the stress, or the pain can be overpowering and it causes our flesh to forget how serious our vows still are. Our minds have the ability to justify doing away with them, but there's only one justice in your sight. Help us to sanctify our marriage, to build it up and remove any doubt far away. Instead, guide us to dwell on the positive and help us to let go of the small stuff.
Father, again, we thank you for these wonderful men who were created in your image. It is your will to see us all treat each other with love and respect, and may we do just that. May our love for each other grow stronger, especially in our spiritual walk with you. Thank you, Lord, for hearing this prayer.
It's in Jesus's name we ask these things and give you praise.
Amen.
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